Santa Seeks Distribution Advice

Winter had just spread its frosty mitt across Iowa.  For the first time since late February, the thermometer was pointing to the low teens, the winds howled with the force of the Polar Jetstream, and the cold bit through my clothes as I stumbled into my office.  It was late into the evening as I sat down at my desk to review some client projections for 2022 and add comments to their business plan. 

I was nose down to the computer when I was startled by a bang and a crash coming from the roof of the office.  A word of explanation, the River Heights Consulting office is an 1871 house located at the top of one of the high bluffs overlooking the Mississippi River in Davenport Iowa.   150-year-old construction is known to creak and sometimes break.  I jumped up looked out the back door to see if house parts were laying on the ground.  There was nothing evident, so I resumed my work. 

Seconds later,  I heard an expected, perhaps even authoritarian knock on the door.  Could it be the local police checking on unusual activity?  When I opened the door, I was in for a shock.  Standing before me was a familiar face, a guy I have known virtually all my life.  Standing there dressed in his trademark red flannel outfit was none other than my old pal, Santa Claus. 

I stood in bewildered amazement, until Santa said, “Holy frozen Reindeer piles Frankie boy, are you going to invite me in or just stand there like a toy robot without a battery?”  I threw open the door and invited Santa in.  I offered him up a chair.

As Mr. Claus sat down, I couldn’t help but notice the depth of the lines under his eyes and the fatigue showing in the way he plunked down in the chair.  Somehow, I realized things weren’t going well for the North Pole gang.  Here’s how the conversation proceeded:

Me:	“Santa, it’s great to see you.  I would offer you some milk and cookies, but quite honestly, I have been on a diet and don’t keep sweets around the office.”
Santa:	“Well, Frankie boy, a glance at the Naughty and Nice list told me you just happen to have a little Bourbon stashed in your file cabinet and tonight may call for something a little neater than warm milk. How about fetching up a couple of glasses and pouring you old friend Santa two fingers in one of those glasses I brought you back in 2015.”

 

Quick as a wink, I popped out of my chair, hustled into the breakroom and grabbed a couple of highball glasses, and fetched up the fancy decanter filled with Ten High.  As I poured a little into a glass for Santa, his facial expressions signaled a need for more than just the standard two-finger dose.  As Santa took a healthy sip and let out a subdued “Ho, Ho, Ho,” our conversation resumed.

Me:	“Santa, I am so sorry.  I meant to send you a letter earlier but I was just so busy.  And, last week I was on my way to the mall to catch up with you but I got an emergency call from a client and had to run back to my office.  This is one of my busiest times.”
Santa:	“Excuses, excuses, you have always been able to launch into a zillion reasons to explain away your frequent appearances on the naughty side of the list.  I think the doozie of them all took place back in about ’62 with that story about your sister’s dolly actually wanting to be tossed into the fireplace.”
Me:	“But Santa, that was such a long time ago…”
Santa:	“Stop it with the whiny excuses, I’m not here to browbeat you.  Instead, Santa wanted to make sure you got some important messages out to all your Distributor pals.  You know, the ones who read that dribble you post online.”
Me:	“Well, Santa… I’m glad you’re not mad.  As for what you refer to as dribble, there are a few people who truly enjoy my writing.  We also had a great response to the interview I had with you last year.  What’s on your mind?”

 

There was a long, pregnant pause.  Honestly, in our six-decade friendship, I have never seen Santa at a loss for

words.  The look on his always merry face indicated he was worried and troubled.  While I am sworn to secrecy on most things tied to his behavior, I couldn’t help but notice he was fumbling with something in his pocket.  After a few minutes, he produced that old clay pipe that appears in so many old photos and asked if smoking was allowed.  Who can say no to a once Jolly Old Elf?  I told him we would have to slip out on the patio to smoke, he declined, and we carried on with our conversation.

Me:	“Santa, obviously something is bothering you.  What’s the deal?  How can I help?”
Santa:	“Well, for the first time in history, our workshop at the North Pole isn’t going to be able to get every present ready for all the good little boys and girls out there.  We have tons of little red wagons all done but the wheels might not make it in time.  And, it brings tears to my eyes every time I look over at the dolls stacking up because we have yet to receive their eyes!  Can you imagine your granddaughter opening up an eye-less doll Christmas morning?  That’s the stuff nightmares are made of!”
Me:	“Yikes, that would be devastating!  Is this because your elves are struggling with COVID outbreaks?”
Santa:	“No Frank, since the big shift of 1959, we started outsourcing some of the parts that go onto our toys.  It has worked great up until today, but now we’re in an unmerry way.  I couldn’t help but notice you have been saying a lot about how to handle these delivery issues with your Distributor pals, got any ideas you can share?”
Me:	“Santa I would be happy to help.  Maybe we should revisit a bit of advice I put together for some of my clients.  Let me pull it up on my computer so you can read it.”

 

With this, I opened something we called 2021 Supply Chain Advice.  Santa pulled out his reading glasses and stared intently at my second (sharing) monitor.  Here’s what it said:

1.      Monitor incoming deliveries closely.  Prioritize incoming deliveries to provide for the most urgent customer orders.

2.      Understand your customer needs.  Is the need urgent?  How do you know?  Are there other issues that have pushed the need for your product out from the original plan?

3.      Develop a plan for “working around” customer needs by offering similar alternative products which solve the customer’s needs.  Is there a workable substitute?

4.      Set/re-set customer expectations.  Make sure the customer knows the product is in short supply and you are doing your best to fill their needs?               

5.      Serve your best customers first.  There will be people who are not good customers coming to you for scarce items.  If someone has not been a good customer in the past, why would you share your allotment of hard-to-find items?

6.      If you have hard-to-find items, don’t be afraid to maximize your profitability.

After looking over the short list, nodding a few times, and then showing a much merrier, all-knowing grin, Santa sat down and resumed our conversation.

Santa:	“I am starting to see a trend here.  Delivering presents isn’t that much different than being a Distributor.  I especially like your idea of workarounds.  I can see how we might be able to put some slightly different wheels on those little red wagons and still get them out and under the tree.”
Me:	“Yep, Santa that has worked in lots of Distributor situations, especially, when customers can’t wait for the ideal solution.”
Santa:	“The workaround thing is a great idea.  There are thousands of kids asking for new roller skates, who really just want something to bop around their driveway.  Maybe we can fix them up with a skateboard or a scooter.  This whole thing is starting to make sense.”
Me:	“I know some of the stuff about serving your best customers probably doesn’t apply that well for kids and toys, but it does in the world of Distribution.”
Santa:	“Ho, Ho, Ho don’t kid yourself, Frankie Boy.  You should see the Naughty and Nice list this year.  There are tons of kids who probably don’t even qualify for a stocking with a big lump of coal.  Normally, Mrs. Claus and I get wrapped up in the Christmas Spirit and leave them a few token presents.  You can bet your sugar plum coated bippy they won’t be receiving anything tough to get this year.”
Me:	“Well Santa, I guess that makes sense.  As a boy who seemed to always fall in that gray area between Naughty and Nice, I kind of feel for those kids.”
Santa:	“Don’t worry, Frank, your little bit of advice here makes up for all those years of Naughtiness.  But don’t ask Santa for another Red Ryder BB Gun, you will only shoot out your eye.  But, the clock is ticking mighty loud.  I have to get back to the North Pole and put some more thought into this whole thing.”

 

With that, I escorted Kris Kringle out to the porch of my office.   With a wink and a twitch of his nose, he levitated to the rooftop and his waiting Reindeer Team.  Like a silent lightning bolt, he streaked into the Northern Sky.  In the distance, I could hear the echo of Santa’s famous “Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night.”

As you can tell, Frank and Santa have an unusual relationship.  Santa makes it a point to visit Hurtte nearly every year.  You might want to read previous episodes.  Here is a collection for you:

Santa Speaks His Mind and Talks about a Strange Gift
Santa delves into the idea that the Pandemic, and other economic storms, are actually a gift to Distributors.

Santa Don't Do It
Santa and I discuss how business plans need a new way of thinking when it comes to people and technology.

Santa on eCommerce
Santa learns how automating a webstore is a gift that keeps on giving all year long.

Santa Shares All... Six Lessons for Distributors
Everything important in distribution can be learned from Santa.

Santa on Selling
Santa discusses how he uses sales tactics like targeting and tracking customer data to improve business at the North Pole.

Fairy Tales for Sales: How to Stay on the Nice List
Little Billy learns how to negotiate with Santa.

Kris Kringle's Executive Meeting
Santa Enterprises has their biggest crisis in over 2,000 years.

Purchasing Problems at the Pole
Cheap products and shoddy services attempt to steal the joy of Christmas.

Knowledge-based Distributors Save Santa
Santa reaches out to Distributors to help with issues like logistics and product shortages.

Frank Hurtte and Santa Claus were introduced by Frank's Grandpa Red and have remained close friends ever since.  This time of year when Frank isn't running the show at River Heights Consulting, he is often mistaken for a skinny Santa by kids all over the Quad Cities.  

Have you ever seen them in the same room?