Is Work-Life Balance a Myth?

Is Work-Life Balance a Myth? Here's Your Sanity Check.

🕒 8 minute read

By Desiree Grace
(with a blurb from Jenny Shannon)

Returning from a recent Women in Industry conference, I found myself reflecting. Reflecting on my mother, grandmother, aunts, sister, female friends, daughter, mentors, mentees, and the dynamic conversations at the event. Those reflections brought me back to two recent conversations with younger working mothers and one of the conference’s recurring themes: the elusive idea of “work‑life balance.”

Twice in the last six months, I’ve had nearly identical conversations with smart, talented working mothers who were filled with self‑doubt. Several women at the conference openly shared similar struggles. They asked whether it was possible to be impactful at work while still being a “great” mom. They wondered if they could do both.

My answer? Yes.

Yes...but. You will have to make tough decisions. You will have to get comfortable saying no. And you will have to make peace with sometimes being “good enough.”

Allow me to expand.

Tough decisions usually involve not your primary priorities, such as family and work, but also the secondary ones. You must be crystal clear on your hierarchy. For some, faith comes next. For others, fitness. For others, something entirely different. Own what comes second, third, and fourth on your list, and say no to everything else. There are only 24 hours in a day, and if you know me, you know I squeeze every drop out of those hours. This advice comes from experience.

Examples help. If you have school‑age children, being deeply involved in every school activity isn’t realistic, especially if your job requires travel. God bless the stay‑at‑home moms who can devote time to PTA; that’s not me. But if I’m in town, I can work the Friday night carnival popcorn machine with enthusiasm, clean up afterward, and move on. Next time, I may not be available, but I’m always willing to contribute financially. That contribution matters too. I’m comfortable volunteering twice a year and writing a few checks. Other working moms should feel comfortable with that as well.

Casual friendships? Ask yourself whether the investment of time and energy is right. If you’ve been on the road all week, Friday night pizza with your family may be the better choice. You cannot be everything to everyone. It’s not sustainable.

Disclaimer: Friendships are important. What matters is choosing wisely. I have a non‑negotiable monthly gathering with my two closest local friends. My daughter sees this, and I hope she learns that deep, reliable friendships are worth the investment.

Setting a realistic example matters. You are not superwoman. No one is. If you miss the mid‑year choir concert because it conflicts with a budget meeting, that’s called being a responsible working adult who is saving for college. Your kids can understand this. You won’t miss all the concerts, but you will miss one or two. That’s life. Give yourself grace. “Most” is good enough.

Now let’s look at the work side.

There is nothing wrong with blocking 30 minutes to pick up your kids from school. That doesn’t mean your workday is only 7.5 hours; it means you’re flexible. I often start at 7 or 7:30 a.m., so I feel zero guilt about a short break to handle school pickup.

There will also be important family events that conflict with work. This is where you need a strong team. You may need a colleague to run a meeting or attend a conference on your behalf. As long as you reciprocate and get detailed notes, you won’t miss your middle‑schooler’s trumpet solo or the sectional track meet.

There is a lot to navigate. It isn’t easy. But you can do both. You just won’t please everyone all the time. And that’s okay.

Console yourself with this data point: you are teaching your kids that life requires choices. Raising capable, independent humans is the goal. Raising kids who can’t function without you is not.

Some weeks will feel balanced. Others won’t. One week, you may pick up your kids every day; the next week, your spouse or parents may need to step in. Maybe it’s time for the bus. Flexibility is part of the deal.

If it helps, I’ll share what I prioritize beyond family and work. I invest in select friendships. I exercise 5–6 times per week,  even if that means a 5:30 a.m. walk. I schedule date nights with my husband twice a month. After nearly 20 years of marriage, I still enjoy his company.

I hope this helps. Set your priorities. 

Say no when you need to. Let go of perfection. You’re doing the best you can, and your kids love you exactly as you are.

Jenny’s Perspective

I don’t have the same schedule as Desiree, but I understand the choices and sacrifices she makes. I work from home most days, and I’m grateful that RHC gives me the flexibility to step out for a school event or a doctor appointment without feeling like I’m letting anyone down.

But flexibility isn’t free. Sometimes it means opening my laptop again after the kids are asleep. Sometimes it means getting up at 4:30 on a weekend morning because that’s when the house is quiet.

It's a choice. I choose it because it lets me show up for my family and still do the work I care about.

Desiree, again

Jenny is right, flexibility isn’t free, and success looks different for everyone. Your version of success changes with life events, priorities, and the independence of your children. Some of us are also part of the sandwich generation, juggling parental care and childcare.

The last thing I want to underline is this: you make time for what you care about. Ask yourself honestly, do you want to do it? Maybe now is not the time for a travel‑heavy job. Trust me, there will be other opportunities.

At RHC, we recognize that balance isn’t one‑size‑fits‑all. We trust our people to create the version that works for their life.

If your team is navigating work‑life balance challenges or performance expectations, River Heights Consulting can help you build a healthier, more effective culture. Let’s talk about what your organization needs next.

TL;DR

Work‑life balance isn’t about perfection; it’s about priorities, flexibility, and giving yourself grace. You can be impactful at work and present at home, but not without tough choices. Most weeks won’t be perfectly balanced, and that’s okay. Focus on what matters most, say no when you need to, and build a version of balance that works for your life.

About the Authors

Desiree Grace has spent her career leading teams, developing talent, and helping people grow into the best version of themselves. She believes in clarity, boundaries, and the kind of leadership that makes room for real life. She brings decades of distribution experience and a deep respect for the working parents who keep both their families and their companies moving forward. She's also known for squeezing 27 hours of productivity into a 24‑hour day.

Jenny Shannon, hybrid-schedule ninja, is behind much of River Heights Consulting’s content and the perspective that keeps the work grounded in real life. She balances client work with school events, appointments, and the everyday rhythm of family life. She believes balance isn’t perfect; it’s personal! She’s grateful to work in a culture that trusts people to build the version that works for them. 

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